A wise man once said, you are not what you were in your past but what you believe you could become in the future. We somehow assume that we are not worthy of doing anything. This self-defeating behaviour is the reflection of our past mistakes. Now some of us think that we have committed an unforgivable mistake or the people around us keep mentioning that we are worth nothing. Also, you believe that worthiness can be earned and you feel there is nothing special about you that could possibly earn . If you continue to think about your past experiences, your future access to success can be blocked.
Contents
1Success is not my cup of tea
I am a total failure
Almost every one of us craves for success yet there are people who can’t handle it when it comes. There is an inner feeling that perhaps we don’t deserve this success. This feeling originates in people with a deep rooted belief that depriving oneself is a virtue or things like success can lead you to selfishness. This could be a possibility but it depends upon your drive. If attaining success was the sole reason of your hard work, then it’s certainly a mean thing. However, you can make a difference by having a positive attitude after success.
2Marking your potential
Still thinking like an Ape?
One of the self undermining behaviours is to label yourself as something incapable. You want to do something and have dreams and ambitions yet you believe ‘I am not that kind of person’. You will think like ‘I am not talkative’ or ‘I like to be formal’. We don’t know this but when we think about something, we can make it happen. So when you believe something is true about yourself, you will do everything possible to make it happen.
3Giving up
I give up
Quitting in the beginning or in the middle of something is as bad accepting a defeat that wasn’t necessarily your fate. Failures, errors, let downs and withdrawals are all part of the quest, but it’s important that you prevent yourself from feeling like a failure. You are certain about your goals and targets so try not to get influenced by other unnecessarily and certainly don’t give up just because you feel the thing is not going to work out. No one can be unworthy of something without first trying out the possibility.
4Defensive attitude
Defensive all the time
Defensiveness is not always a self-defeating behaviour but it can be like that sometimes. When we constantly avoid suggestions or questions, we are acting defensive because we believe that people are picking on us and they don’t really mean to help so we must be on our guard and avoid their suggestions. This is a total self-sabotaging behaviour with which you can block the way to some helpful advice. Warren was a public speaker who was always defensive and never willing to listen to comments from others. Although some of the people were actually picking on him but this doesn’t mean that stops listening to everyone.
5Giving less priority to self change regimen
Feeling unworthy
For a workaholic, weight gain is a common problem. If you are one, you may have received advices to reduce weight but you always manage to come up with an excuse to avoid it. You are not alone. Most people out there are like you. They would say, ‘I can’t manage time’, or ‘the place is too far’. Just reassess your situation and try thinking why it that you are always the last priority for yourself is. Is it because you are not worth it? Well, that’s just your thinking sabotaging the possibility of a good prospect. Be wise enough to identify your situation and work for a positive change.